Be a solution, not a victim.
This month I want to reflect on a philosophy that many successful people have, I used to call it No Excuses! This was a mentality I learned from my step mother, a Puerto Rican woman who worked on Wall Street, with the typical New York attitude. She found much success in her time, sadly it has also taken a toll on her health later in life due to over working herself and anxiety. It’s why I’ve evolved from No Excuses! to “be a solution, not a victim.”
During my 5 year stretch with Domino’s Pizza, the no excuse saying was eventually published in our regularly printed newsletter that we shared with our 40+ stores. They adopted it, because they would put me in stores that had been failing for years, sometimes a decade. They always had the excuse it was a “poor” store, or in a “bad area”, or whatever excuse the supervisor and manager made to pass the responsibility off to some external factor. Early in my life, despite being away from my faith practice, I was being trained to do the right thing, have faith, and eventually the results will come, if I simply give some effort to the right direction.
By the end of my career, in reflection I successfully turned around 31 out of 33 stores between my time with Papa John’s and Domino’s, in addition to some smaller pizzas shops and a couple coffee shops where I influenced a culture of change. In the end, I always tried to be a solution to my situation, instead of being a victim. In my cases of admitted failure, I learned some people simply don’t want to change, it’s why I am happy to take the blame and walk away. Fighting solves nothing, it only brews more animosity which is what caused me a lack of promotion in life.
This occurred to me when I returned to Domino’s to help a friend in 2015. I was happy to return to the company I spent so many amazing years with. They really helped me develop my skills supporting me whenever I wanted to try something out of the box allowing me to learn through trial and error. My friend was opening a new store and I just happen to stop by in the middle of an Uber ride and church visit. She expressed a need for help and I offered my assistance. After 3 months they moved her to one of my old stores, and I agreed to go help her there. She was literally doing the same thing I did 10 years earlier, and I was being sucked into my previous role, for even lesser pay and no authority to fix the situation. In this moment I knew I couldn’t be a solution, nor was I going to be a victim and participate in this repetitive and sometimes vicious cycle. In some cases this was abuse due to the long and crazy hours many in the food industry work which can lead to an unhealthy life in many respects. On the other side, you have to pay your dues at some points, discerning this is important. I quit after several days, they offered to move me, but I declined, because just like government assistance, once you get into it, it’s often easy to become content, dependent, and a slave to the system.
I share this specific moment, because we have hundreds, maybe thousand of these moments in life, where we will face good/bad consequences for our choices. Some will elevate us to where we want to go in life, others will keep us on the hamster wheel of life many of us “choose.” This was my life for the first 30 years, now the last 10 years many say “I wish I could do what you do.” Reality is we can. The question is are you willing to sacrifice your insecure ego telling you that you can’t do something. With patience, and God’s will you can. I say God’s will, because very often we are chasing something we are not designed to do. In my case I was always trying to get that “promotion” we all seek, but often my attitude was unwilling to play that game. This was an important understanding for me until this day. I’m not a yes man, i’m too opinionated and constantly questioning things. In some cases I have great insight and critical perspective, but in others I do shoot myself in the foot. Thank God for confession. My weekly practice of this shines the light on those dark corners, and with patience I smooth out these rough edges. Sometimes it takes a year or two, but acknowledging my weakness helps me to address it in time.
This led me to finally have the courage to start my own business. As my first month of farmers markets come to a close, I have peace I finally found my path in business. To see peoples reactions that I (we) have created something so unique, I realized I broke out of the corporate/franchise cookie cutter mold, and did what I have dreamed of since 2004. I do not have plans of being super rich, it’s too many problems and trouble. Like many Americans I just want to make enough to enjoy my life with my wife, friends and family. In addition to provide for my future daughter. This is far easier now days budgeting my money. Although I’m horrible at this, I try not to waste it like I did on bar tabs in my youth thinking I was a rock star.
There’s still a lot of sacrificing ahead like working my job at Papa John’s currently to supplement my income. I know with patience and the right choices I am becoming a solution to my life, instead of being a victim. This is the American Dream in a nutshell, so many people leave their countries and come here to a land of opportunity, freedom and liberty. My favorite culture I like to reference in this moment are the Vietnamese, but pretty much anyone that comes from a communist dictatorship express these sentiments. They are crafty people due to the limited resources they have back home. It’s why in places like Cuba, they are driving cars from the 50’s, because they figure out a way to keep fixing them, despite not having the resources for a new one or even the parts needed to replace the broken one. They then come to America with vast resources and blossom due to their work ethic, and appreciation for how great our country is.
This is why the immigrant (and some others who are poor) are so successful, unlike many American’s they do not take for granted everything we have, instead they appreciate it and maximize it. They too choose to be a solution by joining our world, assimilating to our society of success, while at the same time preserving their culture. They could’ve stayed in their country where they are comfortable and familiar with, and be a victim. Instead they went out and found opportunity through sacrificing their content ways. There is the reverse side, of each generation in America some become more content in their success and life. I see this in my Italian culture. The glamorization of ignorant Italians on t.v. doing silly things, instead of contributing to society on a higher level of character like many of the modern immigrants.
With everything you need discernment before a leap of faith, when that time comes however, just take one step at at a time and when you look back you can be amazed at all the leaps of faith you took on the way to your personal destiny, something I learned on not just a biblical level, but through the Alchmeist which is a biblical allegory. In addition when you study the successful, many of them had a long process from A-Z, unfortunately we only see the end result without all the struggles in between. It’s what The Traveling Shepherd does, discover life through travels, even if it’s just around the corner, sharing these discoveries through coffee, conversation and connections.
Here are some images of the resourcefulness I saw when I was in Vietnam. The boat was someone’s home in this community of house boats, it usually doubled as a work space for fishing. In the case of the woman with drinks. She was in Ha Long Bay and would row up to the tourist boats to sell her items. The bikes with the cargo is also fascinating. In America we would buy a SUV which is 10x the cost in basic price. Probably 10x the gas as well. In the same breath the SUV as I have learned truly makes my business efficient. I want to buy a trailer, but I have learned to fit everything into my SUV, the whole reason I bought it originally. Some interesting contrast and perspective to see.